Weekend Recap

So, this weekend... What to say? It was great and it was not.

Explanation:

Actually, let's start a bit earlier than Friday and go back to Wednesday when I asked Tara to MARRY ME! Yup, did the whole bit - actually, it was kind of funny, because I didn't *do* the whole bit - you know, being all romantic, because, well, that's not my way. OK, so I did get down on two knees to ask her, but no fanfare whatsoever. It was very spur of the moment (although, I did have a ring, so how spur of the moment is that?). I just told her that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and that I wanted her to be my wife. She, of course, said yes. There was a tiny problem with the ring - it was all WRONG, but whatever, I'll get a more appropriate one that is more Tara's style. No, no, no, she wasn't ungrateful; matter fact, I had to convince her to let me take the ring so that I can exchange it for a better one. She was all lovey dovey and mushy - kinda cute actually.

Friday, I took her to the Melting Pot. I had psyched her out that we were going somewhere else. Also, I previously had not really liked MP, so there was no clue that we would be going. She didn't realise it until we got into the *parking lot* that we were at MP, that's how surprised she was. So, needless to say, she loved it! And, we had a great time, the food was excellent, the service was excellent, etc etc.

Later that evening, she took me back to her place and it was all decked out in rose petals with balloons and I was appropriately unresponsive AND ungrateful. Yeah, I suck. So, that ruined the rest of the evening, pretty much. Not even any anniversary nookie, BTW. True, true, when people (i.e. Tara) put expectations on things, they almost always don't go as planned and no one (i.e. Tara and I) is happy. Unfortunately, the weekend devolved from there.

Oh wait, let me mention the plans that she had on Saturday that I completely misunderstood and scheduled my tutoring (part-time gig) for ALL day, thereby *ruining* all of her plans. Just confirming that I suck.

Saturday was sucky, sucky, sucky. We had an awful argument about how I am *so* not romantic and completely unreceptive to her romantic things/ideals. We came to a positive (or so I thought) resolution to the argument where she needs to accept me for who I am (not a bad idea, anyway) and that conventional romantic stuff is really not my thing and that she needs to do other stuff; the problem with that is that I don't *know* what I like in the romance division. I like it when other people are romantic together (movies, books, friends), just not with me. You could see how this might create a problem, when Tara is extremely romantic. Yeah, problems.

Sunday was not as sucky, although it ended on a bad note. she took me out to movie and dinner, where she asked me to marry her again (second time around for her) and I got my engagement ring back from her! Yay! It's all cleaned up and sparkly. Then, later, we (OK, really it was just Tara) proceeded to relive our earlier argument in front of one our friends, which I wasn't entirely happy about (Although, I just relived it here, no?).

Oh yes, and we will not see each other until this Saturday, because of our schedules, so we have to work through this business on the phone. It's hard enough doing that in person, much less on the phone. After our argument on Saturday, I recommended that we seek therapy (something that we should have done a while ago) because, even though we communicate fairly well and can work through the minor stuff (big improvement from where we were at previously, though), we don't argue/problem solve the big stuff very well. We just get rude and almost mean.

So, pretty much, the weekend was sucky, which sucks, because it was a very important anniversary - one that almost didn't happen. I am trying not to view it as a bad omen for the future of the relationship, but it's a bit hard.

So, to end this post on not-so-negative note (because it really can't be positive after that ickyness, can it?). This is not the end of the world for us. It's just something that we need to work on and find a suitable solution. Tara needs to be more accepting of who I am and the way I do things. And I pretty much need to be more open to things (this applies to everything, because, even though I have a sunny disposition, I am awfully negative about things), which will help Tara out. We really love each other, which is why we put up with each other's crap and try to work through it.

Sunshine

PS. I will also prob get ish for putting this out in the blogosphere. But, of course, because I am *HARD-HEADED* and maybe daft, I am putting it out anyway. Stupid, stupid, stupid.